Romance Coach Reading List

April Braswell, Romance Coach and Online Dating Coach, reviews and suggests these books for attracting, finding, and developing the Romantic Relationship of your dreams through singles dating.

It is Summer Time and it is time for some fun reading!  If you are headed to the beach, bring some of these excellent books along with you for some great self-education for Romantic Love and a more fulfilling sexual relationship.  You can read these books on public transit for your commute to work as well.  Enjoy and happy reading!

EARLY ON - WHAT TO DO, HOW TO TALK TO GET MORE GREAT DATES

Irresistible Attraction:  Secrets of Personal Magnetism

Irresistible Attraction is about becoming our most attractive in our behavior and interactions with others.  The internationally knowned author of the best-seller, The Psychology of Persuasion,  Influence and Persuasion master Kevin Hogan coauthored this very approachable book with Mary Lee Labay.  I'm kind of laughing here.  Whenever I think of this book, I think of it as like, Personal Magnetism and Attractiveness for the Rest of Us. 

Ok, so you are not actually a sought after celebrity movie star, super model or NFL star quarterback?  So, you are not a 10 even a 9.  Maybe you are a 7, a 6, or even a 4.  In Irresistible Attraction, the authors teach you and provide ample examples of behaviors and communications to have with others to increase your attractiveness quotent and to be more successful in dating. 

And indeed, the more successful we are in dating, the greater our chances of finding love and creating a really great romantic relationship.  I highly recommend this book to my clients to read and practice before heading out on Date0.  It will really help you in your conversations to increase your attractiveness to others.  And in romance, we all want to be more magnetically attractive, don't we?  In which case, yup, go buy this book now.

How to Find a Husband After 35

Another excellent, excellent book to read is Rachel Greenwald's How to Find a Husband After 35.  This book is excellent.  It really provides an overall dating strategy.  Many of us put more thought, planning, and preparation into our next vacation or job than we do into finding and attracting our spouse.  While this book is targeted towards women, hence the title, this is really an excellent book for either men or women, straight or gay.  And the author mentions that as well.  Ms. Greenwald recommends a strategic approach to finding romantic love, and as a professional Romance Coach, I completely concur.  Now the thing is, and she does recommend that you find a mentor, most folks really do require and coach and mentor to do these steps (maybe not all of them, even if you 80% of all she recommends you will be doing great!) and to implement these strategic dating steps into our lives.

I really like her points and explanations about Online Dating.  The very goal of Online Dating is the efficient sheer volumne of numbers of people who see you online and with whom you could then possibly have dates.  We now have speed dating to add to that equation, which is great.  This book came out in 2004, so some of her specifics are no longer available, but it is still and excellent read for preparing yourself really to seek love and a spouse.  Please, this is your life and hopefully a romantic love mate for life or at least a very long time.  Let's think about it and make a concerted effort to find the best romantic life partner for YOU, and not just leave it to happenstance.  If it were going to happen as a result of what you already just do in your life, it would have already happened by now. 

BEING IN A ROMANTIC RELATIONSHIP - NAVIGATING TO THE ALTAR

Two books which I recommend both for my clients who are looking to jump start their dating lives, to get dates, to get more dates as well as those who are in a faltering romantic relationship when they approach me to coach them as a Romantic Relationship Coach:

John Gray's Mars and Venus on a Date

Pat Allen's Getting to I Do

Both of these superb and well-qualified authors take an approach that understands and affirms both men and women.  They also discuss and provide an overview of the course of courtship (dating with the intent to marry, not just casual relationship sex, perfectly fine, different goal and approach entirely).  They both outline the different Phases of a Relationship.  These books are both so inexpensive and each is so helpful in different and also aligned ways, I really do recommend you buy both of them.  Pat talks about how a woman flirts and magnetizes men for love, so this is something which you will want to buy now at the beginning of your dating.  John teaches a lot more about how men think and what a man is thinking and doing during each relationship stage.  What woman couldn't use an insiders' perspective on "WHAT are men thinking?" while dating.

Now the thing is, as both of them discuss some of the mutual couple communication in a 21st century style and what needs to happen in each phase.  Quite often when my clients who are in a faltering romantic relationship approach me, it is because they are in stage 2 or 3 and had omitted essential communication and relationship negotiations that needed to happen in Phases 1 and 2 beforehand.  The beautiful thing is, it's not too late.  You can still do those communications and negotiations.  You, of course, need to learn what they are and how to do them.  The books will tell you what they are a little of how to do them.  As your Romance Coach, I can teach you more fully HOW TO have them.  Then you decide if you want to move forward with your current relationship or if you two aren't aligned and don't want the same thing.