Dating Relationship Expert | Personal Singles Coaching | Internet Personals Ad Profile Writer | About April | MEDIA                 Hope
Dating Relationship Help & Advice Blog| Boomer Mate Selection Advice| Dating Store | Appearances / Events

SoCal Seminars >> Communication Workshop for Professionals and Singles Work with April Live!




Obituaries, Grief, Death, and the Triumph of the Human Spirit

By April Braswell


It is such a strange gift to have at such a young age, but I have had 6 major relationship deaths in the past 6.5 years.  I was married at 36 and a widow at 37, having lost my husband after 13 months of marriage. 


My mother then died 3 years ago. 


My grandmother 2 years ago. 


My father just this month. 


(My FIL and my uncle also.)


So, when my late husband died after my walking alongside him and his battle with cancer.  The journey as well as the grief journey both left such strong imprints on me, that I knew I could not ultimately continue in the work I was doing.  I knew I was already a leader and that people were watching me and my example. 


Having emerged from the grief of losing my husband, I found that women yoiunger than I, women with more youthfully perfect skin and figures weren't self-confident.  They had some belief in themselves.  Just, they really doubted themselves.  They were more full of their insecurities than their confidence. 


I, on the other hand, I was very confident.  They observed me and thought I was fantastic because I would take risks they were too afraid to do, simply lacked the self-confidence and belief in themselves to do or even to try.  I simply knew who I was, and who I was not, so I was now incredibly self-confident. 


There are a few things I recommend and embody because of this.



How to treat the greiving


Those who are most recently grieving, those who were the closest to the deceased, are going through a number of emotions, often all at once.  Be kind, thoughtful, and gracious.


There are two relief valves for this - laughter and tears.  Slap stick movies help with the laughter.  Nothing terribly high brow sophisticated.  Think as silly and goofy as possible.  I cried so much when my husband died I actually started to crave salt. 


1.  Send a card.


Your mother, father, and grandmother taught you to do this.  You thought nothing of it.  You think of it as just a little nothing gesture, almost akin to the lost art of a handwritten thank-you note.  However, you do not know how much it means to the grieving.  We cling to it.  We can hardly talk right after the death.  Immediately after the death of my husband, I was catotonic.  People from church sent cards of condolence.  They started to arrive within a matter of days.  I clung to them.  These thoughtful little gestures of genuine caring meant THE WORLD to me. 


I have heard that some people get angry with the card or note.  That is ok.  The card was just coat hanger for their anger.  Indeed, anger and rage are a piece of the grief process.  You have given them a gift to help them touch that emotion that maybe they had not given themselves permission yet to feel, thinking they are only supposed to be sad and cry.


My mother when she lost her first child after only a matter of months, she received condolence letters.  Letters were more common at the time.  She told me so softly years later what a thoughtful gesture they were from people.  When we feel lost and reeling in our world of grief, they are like small life preservers from other dear ones reminding us of those who care and that there is still a world out there.



2. Phone Them, Briefly


People would phone me to reach out.  I would blather on the phone for a few minutes and, of course, cry at some point.  What a gift just to be able to talk a little bit about the deceased.  The people who phone, most were so uncomfortable with my crying.  What did you think I would be doing?  Just LET the griever have their process.  Keeping the conversation short is usually best.  Let them talk a little and cry a little. Give them the space to grieve.  Give them the gift of God's ears.  Be like God and just LISTEN to them.  Murmer a few pleasant nothings.  Tell them you care, and then end the conversation.


Some of the time, they don't WANT to talk.  Yes, and I am extrovert, so if I say this, it is quite a statement.  I am often so lowkey and inwardly focused reflective after a death that I do not WANT to talk, or really only for a few moments.  It is an effort to converse.  I'm sure Dr. Kevin Hogan would be able to tell me more about why and what part of the brain affected. 



3. At the Memorial or Funeral Service


This can vary by culture and ethnic groups of origin.  Some are more emotive and demonstrative.  Others are more quiet in public about their grief.  Please, neither is right.  Neither is wrong.  They are both at different stages and expressions of the grief.  Just HONOR it.


So, when you are at a service that is more demonstrative, wonderful.  Be sure you have plenty of Kleenex.


When you are where they are more subdued, please be careful with the bereaved and do not be too, too terribly gushing and huggy.  To do so is to be IN the emotional state and triggers that for them just at a time when they may have only just managed to keep their unstoppable streaming tears and emotions within a degree of control.


Grief can be a very intimate thing.  I did not want to share all of it with everyone in public.  My world was already turned on its head.  To do so would have been to lose all my sense of context and frame in the world.  It might have stimulated excessive cognitive dissonance where I would have had no point of reference, no anchor, no plumbline.


Some people are still in the psychological denial stage and will say, "I just want to celebrate their lives!"  That is totally beautiful and a valid place to be in.  However, when you juxtapose that with another bereaved who is in the scowling anger stage, keep them apart to avoid bouts of slapthology from the angry bereaved to the celebrating bereaved.  It's just thoughtful.  Safer too!


Additionally, the bereaved IS totally caught up in the grief.  At the service, a gentle way to shift them is to ask softly about beautiful memories, "I remember you always telling me how much he enjoyed walking in nature.  Remember when he used to take you to the park and walk the dog in the evening?"  This helps them to shift without TELLING them to shift or demanding them to shift just when what they are feeling is that they can't talk to anyone.


4. Months later


Months later, at a Birthday, at Valentine's Day, Thanksgiving, Christmas, Yom Kippur, Easter, Passover, at their wedding anniversary, New Years.  These are all times which will re-trigger the pain of the loss.  Just gently and thoughtfully reach out to them. Sometimes just a simple card, "Thinking of you.  You continue to be in my thoughts and prayers.  Hope you are healing well....."  A short phone call.  The grief cycle takes 5 years to complete.  But always, when there is a major family event, like my brother getting married this year, it touches the wound and reminds us of who was unable to make it to the wedding.


God bless and God speed,


April Braswell


Time for Love, Time for Money: Time Production System

Time for Love, Time for Money: Time Production System, romance, romance coach, online dating coach, romantic relationship coach, romance coaching, online dating coach, romantic relationship coaching, how to find your life partner, how to find your soul mate, how to find your soul mate online, how to find love online,



Click here to apply to have April to review and rewrite your internet dating profile, using PayPal for your purchase of the service and she will be in touch via email to schedule coaching times and email you the workbook for you to complete for writing your great dating site profile.

 Featured Articles:

Top 5 Internet Dating Profile Mistakes Women Make that Turn Guys OFF Online

Online Dating Tips for Guys: Where NOT to Meet for a First Date

Senior Singles Online Dating Profile Tips: Avoiding the Day Old Bread Stale Dating Profile


April Braswell, Dave Lakhani, Kevin Hogan, Romance Coach, Online Dating6 Coach, Relationship Coach, Sexuality Coach, Speed Dating, Dating Tips, Romantic Sex, Dating Articles

Kevin Hogan, PhD, Reading Body Language Expert, author of best-sellers, The Psychology of Persuasion and most recently, The Secret Language of Business: How to Read Anyone in 3 Seconds or Less. Dave Lakhani, author of Persuasion: The Art of Getting What You Want. April Braswell, Kevin Hogan, and Dave Lakhani at the Venetian. (Las Vegas)




April Braswell and Matt Hoover, Biggest Loser Winner Season 2

April Braswell and TV's Biggest Loser Season Two Winner, Matt Hoover in Boise

See More Pictures


The Dating Doctor that rocks! Whether you are looking to connect with another human being on a deeper level or just need help in rejuvenating your current relationship, April is the spark that will ignite your passion, your self-confidence and a greater sense of sexual success. April's advice is invaluable especially when she employs her tried and tested dating on the job resulting in many individuals and couples experiencing long term happiness. Overall, April is a must see , who has given me excellent solid advice and a greater clarity in knowing how to enjoy my personal life more!

David Power
Clinical Hypnotherapist, London,UK


David Power, Romance Coach, Online Dating Coach, Relationship Coach, Sexuality Coach, Speed Dating, Dating Tips, Romantic Sex, dating articles


April is an amazing person...she has an incredible ability to connect with people and to make everyone she comes in contact with feel special.  

Jennifer Skinner
Wardrobe Planning Expert and Image and Style Consultant

Jennifer Skinner, Romance Coach, Online Dating Coach, Relationship Coach, Sexuality Coach, Speed Dating, Dating Tips,








Darryl Hanah and April Braswell, Online Dating Coach, Dating Expert, Las Vegas, January 2009, Mandalay Bay

April Braswell met Darryl Hanah at the Mandalay Bay, Las Vegas, NV


April Braswell, Theresa Flynt, AEE, Las Vegas, Venetian, Larry Flynt, Flynt Management Group, Dating Expert,

April Braswell met Theresa Flynt in Las Vegas at the Venetian, Larry Flynt's daughter, and marvelous Executive Business Woman in her own right, VP of Operations, of Flynt Management Group. 



I just met April at a conference in Philly.  What a vivacious, self-assured, beautiful and incredible woman!!  It’s obvious how her energy and passion are part of everything in her life and that she can coach you in tapping into your own life force to show the world the beautiful person you are and attract the type of man you want.

Debra Shetzler

Debra Shetzler, April Braswell, Romance Coach, Online Dating Coach, Relationship Coach, Sexuality Coach, Speed Dating, Dating Tips,



 April Braswell, Ben Mack, Romance Coach, Online Dating Coach, Relationship Coach, Sexuality Coach, Speed Dating, Dating Tips,

Ben Mack and April Braswell together at Kevin Hogan's Influence Boot Camp 2008 in the LUXOR, Las Vegas, NV.  "You're BRILLIANT!  It's true," Ben Mack said about April Braswell.  Dr. Ben Mack is author of Think Two Products Ahead.







April Braswell - Singles Relationship  Coach

Readers Favorite Articles  

Top 5 Worst Internet Personals Ads Mistakes Women Make Turning Guys Offline Online

Online Dating Tips for Guys: Where NOT to Meet for a First Date

Senior Singles Online Dating Profile Tips: Avoid the Day Old Bread Stale Website Profile

Online Dating Expert Advice April Braswell Internet Personals Ads Writer

Singles and Couples Relationship Cultivation Queen April Braswell

Connect with April at Google+

 Singles Columnist at

April and I worked on an online dating profile for me. The price was amazing for the amount of real effort she put into her work. She way over delivered. She wrote the profile and also included an hours free coaching. April did not ask just enough questions to write a profile, she asked so many questions she got to know me and I mean really know me and what made me tick. She then wrote a profile I was so happy with. I recommend April and her work. - Mike J, AU 



April is a brilliant giver. She shares her time, information and exhubrance. Her articles are cheeky and great fun to read, even if you are not a boomer. If you are a baby boomer, she's just the resource you need to get back on your feet when it comes to romance. Whether you have lost a spouse to death or divorce, she can help you heal that wound.

Kate McKeon GenX

Kate McKeon 




April Braswell, Relationship Coach Par Excellence! I had been stuck in a relationship that was going nowhere with a man who did not love me and who did not make me happy.... April gave me the confidence to HOPE that there was someone out there who would love me and accept me for who I was. She held my hand thoughout the whole the experience, or I would never gone online....I was too skittish about the whole deal. In fact, I told her, "April, I have already met all the single men in the Metro area in my age agroup. There's no one out there for me that I am interested in!  But April's warmth, encouragement, and compassion challenged me to venture online. I did and enjoyed a number of good results. I had some good dates. This was good. But still...I had not met THE one. Then she encouraged me to try another service...and within several weeks...I was dating new men.  It was GREAT.   What a difference.  THANK YOU......I love you!!! Sonya L. 














April Braswell 2019
All Rights Reserved
To apply to have April Braswell
review and craft your dating profile or for relationship dating coaching:
Copywriting Teaching Guru, David Garfinkel, Boomer Dating Expert, April Braswell, Kevin Hogan Influence Bootcamp, Las Vegas, Luxor,
Guru Copywriting Teacher, David Garfinkel and April Braswell in Las Vegas
Millenial Mentor, African American Motivational Speaker, Al Duncan, Cougar Dating Expert, April Braswell, Kevin Hogan Influence Bootcamp, Las Vegas, LUXOR 
Al Duncan and April Braswell in Las Vegas
Boomer Dating Expert, April Braswell, Sabrina Peterson, Luxor, Las Vegas,
Women's Fitness Expert, Sabrina Peterson and April Braswell in Las Vegas 
Baby Boomer Internet Dating Coach, April Braswell, Trisha Chambers, Luxor, Las Vegas 
The New Mrs. Chambers and April Braswell in Las Vegas 


Cougar Love Dating Expert, April Braswell, Greg Dougall, Newport Beach, Royal Thai
Cougar Dating Expert, April Braswell, lunches with Autism Documentary film maker, Greg Dougall, Newport Beach, CA





Dating Expert, April Braswell, with Bold Calling Sales Trainer, Steve Chambers, Mo's San Diego, CA
Baby Boomer Dating Expert, April Braswell, the Dating Coach of Women After 40+ with Corporate Sales Taining Bold Calling author, Steve Chamber, Mo's San Diego, CA